This is how we got here ... in order
My earlier writings especially may make most sense read in chronological order and substack isn't the most intuitive for viewing posts that way. Below is a chronological listing of my posts.
The enormity of my grief is a measure of my love, and my writings are the process of attempting to put that into words.
John was diagnosed with stage 4B non-small cell lung cancer (NSCLC) in January 2024. Over the following year and a half he battled cancer with bravery and a quiet, yet fierce determination He lived that year and half of his diagnosis for the future — he lived with such positivity and radiance, as if we had forever, as though we weren’t on borrowed time.
His life was lived through connection and authenticity, and his magnetism and heart lit up the lives of those around him. In May 2025, I had started this substack to keep fiends and family updated on John’s journey. On June 22, 2025 my John Marty — my husband of 18 years, best friend of 22 years, father to my son, passed away.
My substack, which started as a way to update friends and family, has become a place to document my loss and grief.
Posts of this is how we got here in chronological order
The first 15 posts in my substack are updates on John’s journey to get medical treatment for his stage 4B NSCLC.
This is how we got here originally published May 24, 2025 — This was my first post, and offers a recap of the past year and half of our lives since John’s stage 4B cancer diagnosis.
Flight Changes originally published May 26, 2025
Sunday Update originally published June 1, 2025
Landed originally published June 2, 2025
Treatment #1: Delayed originally published June 3, 2025
Not a lot of news, but not no news originally published June 5, 2025
Saturday Night update originally published June 7, 2025
Treatment #1 + Nerve Block originally published June 9, 2025
Bronchoscopy originally published June 14,2025
Update originally published June 14, 2025
Getting John Back to Denver originally published June 15, 2025
John’s flight home is today originally published June 17, 2025
John is back in Denver originally published June 17, 2025
Update originally published June 18, 2025
Saturday Update originally published June 21, 2025
John passed from this life on Sunday, June 22, 2023 at 11:47PM MST. The posts published after that date document and share my experience in grief.
John is a beautiful person originally published June 23, 2025
What my grief feels like originally published June 24, 2025
Update originally published June 25, 2025
The smell of grief originally published June 27, 2025
The World Needs More People Like John Marty originally published June 29, 2027
Planning: Celebrating John originally published June 30, 2025
IYKYK originally published July 1, 2025
First 4th originally published July 4, 2025
John’s Camera Roll originally published July 6, 2025
Remembering the magnetic, kind, funny: JOHN MARTY originally published July 7, 2025
On Tuesday I went to pick up John. originally published July 11, 2025
What my grief feels like now originally published July 15, 2025
Do you have photos of John to share? originally published July 20, 2025
Sweet hearts originally published July 21, 2025
Remembering John Marty originally published July 29, 2025
To be softer. originally published August 2, 2025
I thought of my sweet John — of course originally published August 8, 2025
Grief in the happy moments originally published August 12, 2025
A clock in the rubble originally published August 16, 2025
